After divorce proceedings have begun, many find themselves so bitter that they "hate" the opposite sex. They gravitate towards others that feel the same way, gaining strength in numbers. Why did these people become women or men "haters?" This is discrimination.

Discrimination of any kind is born from lack of knowledge or understanding. It's also born of fear. As is all discrimination, rather than taking the time and effort to get to know or understand the opposite sex, they give into their fears. They condemn all for the actions of a few. Because we are meant to interact and live as couples, this "hate" of the opposite sex puts a hold on your life. It also changes the way your children look at the opposite sex. They hear your harsh criticism; they believe you, and then they follow in your "hate" footsteps. Children learn discrimination of all kinds from their parents and/or other adults they look up to. Your hate restricts their lives as well.

Yes, men and women are different, but they both want them same things from life. Both men and women want to be happy and live peaceful, fulfilling lives. We are all basically the same, we all want to be validated and appreciated for who we are. We need to break down the "difference" barrier. The only way to do that is with communication. Is it that simple? I think so! Communication is the key! We are not mind readers. We need to talk with open and honest communication. The more men and women talk, the more they will realize that their differences are really not that great. The differences that you do discover are to be celebrated. We compliment each other. Each of us has their strengths and weaknesses that we must get to know, understand and respect. Just because your "ex" hurt you doesn't mean that every man or women you meet will follow in his or her footsteps. You must conquer your fear in order to get over your hate and live a healthy, satisfying life.

You could try an online chat to start out. Find a chat on a topic that you are interested in. Look at what they say, how they feel. You will discover they feel the same way you do. Remember to be honest. Then slowly, inter-mingle with the opposite sex. Observe how they react in different situations. Don't be afraid to talk to them. Get to know, understand and respect their unique capabilities. Let them get to know, understand and respect your unique capabilities as well. Don't be afraid to become friends with a person of the opposite sex. This will give you both a better understanding of each other. It will also give you the security and interest to develop a deeper relationship in the future with someone. When you meet someone that is a little extra special, go out with that person on a one on one basis. Give that person a chance to enrich your life and help you grow.

You'd never get this chance by hating!