I'm cruisin' down the highway in my brand new car.
The stereo is cranked and the window's ajar.
I know where I'm a-going and it ain't to far.
Tonight I'm gonna pick up at the redneck bar.

The outside of the building's covered with bullhorns.
I put my tanned arm out and I opened the door.
I entered the establishment, my beer was poured.
I'm drinkin' with the boys, but I'm a-gonna score.

I set my sights upon a girl by the bud sign.
She didn't have a drink so I sent her a wine.
I sat there for a moment thinking up a line.
The words came out so easy 'cause she was so fine.

She listened to my words like they were from the Lord.
She sat and sipped her wine while my beers were all poured.
She volunteered to take me to her room and board.
I gave her the keys to my brand new Ford.

We exited the bar and ended up outside.
She reached into my pocket so I thought "alright."
She took all of my money then pushed me aside.
I watched with blurry vision as she stole my ride.

I woke up the next morning with a pickled brain.
My parents' car was missing and I was to blame.
While walking home I used the time to contemplate
The irony within the player being played.